WHO WE ARE
We are a happily married couple of over 40 years, with 5 children and 7 grandchildren. We’re just practical people who have made it too over 60 years of age and can look back and see the how’s and whys of why we’re so happy. There were lots of good decisions, lots of times of prayers and just walking though some really hard stuff together, but we are still together and really really joyfully too. Lots of podcasters are making things way to hard or they are just click bait, but we honestly have everything we have ever wanted and now the only thing that we want to do with our time left here to to share and encourage others in your journey on this life. Learn from our mistakes and we will point out the nasty bumps ahead so you can avoid them, but also offering suggestions of don’t miss the most meaningful moments of your life. The lousy stuff yells really loud and if thats all you focus on you will most likely miss the best bits of life. The most meaningful are often the softest spoken moments. A hand held during a sorrowful moment, the quiet of holding your new born baby. These moments treasure, and let them sink in and appreciate them for what they are. These are the moments to live for. These are the moments you will be thinking about on your death bed. Those loud moments of a new car or promotion though fun don’t carry the weight of being truly meaningful. Life is messy and hard and fun and glorious. Most importantly it s a gift to be appreciated and treasured, not lived in fear or frivolously squandered doing meaningless nonsense like video games, make up tutorials. So join us as we share our insights so you can “Double your Joys and Divide your Sorrows!“
OUR INSPIRATION
One night I woke up around 3am and was wide awake and so was my husband and we started joking about yeah get old and you never sleep again, lol. We started reminiscing about all of our experiences over the past forty years, we were laughing and holding hands. (This was one of my happiest memories together. It was such a sweet and real time together). We realized we raised five children and their all alive lol, and on top of that they’re amazing people! We gave each other a high five! Babe we did it! I remember getting married and thinking I couldn’t wait to grow old with my husband, and here we are old. That’s a whole other book.
The next morning I woke up happy and was thinking about our marriage, and why were we’re still happily married after almost 40 years.
Then I heard Patrick Ben-David podcast and he said, “Who are the five closest people to you? You will be like them.” I thought about that question a lot, and that one question made me write this book! I started to think about the five people closet to me. Most are happily married couples. I have a few very close family and friends that are divorced but are supportive of marriage. They know it’s not marriage, but who you marry.Then I realized that we exist in a bunch of different cultures. Our marriage culture, our home culture, our work culture and I realized how each culture affects us, our marriage and the quality of our lives.
Lots of people are slamming marriage, deriding it and honestly have no clue about what they are talking about. They haven’t been married nor come from a family where marriage is not displayed well. If they don’t want to get married that’s fine. Don’t! But why make all women seem (bad) and tell men there’s no benefit to marriage when it clearly, very clearly is one of the best things for men and women to do. Why are they bringing other people down trying to prop themselves up. Just don’t get married then! But there is more going on here. From purposeful misinformation to selfishness and guilt, to making money and trying to gain influence.
What do our hearts really want? We don’t have to admit to anyone but ourselves, It might not seem cool in our culture or to our people group. But we want something real. A real relationship, real love, real purpose, really being needed and being able to rely on another person who will sacrificially love you when you need it the most. Most of us want something real, something that is true, no game. Someone to walk through the storms of life with, as well as enjoy the sunrises and sun sets with. After everything we have gone through theses past few years, we want REAL! We have been lied to, misrepresented, betrayed and…
The popular culture is telling us to be satisfied with an illusion, but illusions are not something we can lean on, they are not real. You can’t hug an illusion, hold onto or work for an illusion. Illusions don’t make us care and grow and find purpose in. Maybe for are season they quench our thirst, but shortly we are left thirsty for something real. Like during the gold rush, miners were looking for real gold that had worth and substance, they were not satisfied with fools gold that is fake and doesn’t have any real value. It might pass for the moment but its value isn’t lasting.
I’m a Christian, wife and mom. I do lots of other things, but at heart I love The Lord, love my husband and love my children. Sounds simply, it might sound unsatisfying to some, but my heart is full. I have loved, I am loved. I have invested my life in the most important things in life and I am reaping the dividends of a well lived life. I am honestly sitting here typing and my eyes are filled with tears of joy and my chest feels as if it will explode with gratefulness. It’s hard to make the right choices in life. (To discern where each road goes of decision will bring you to i the end. So many ways, so many desire and wants. Most short term desires fight against long term goals. But oh if you even get part of this crazy, messy imperfect life right, If you learn to live well, discern good from evil, learn to invest your life (heart, mind, time, emotions) into something worthwhile your life will be worth all the struggle and stretching to grow beyond yourself. I am old. I have lived more than I will live. That’s why I’m writing this book. To share with this younger generation that has faced and will probably face things we have never even dreamed possible, both good and evil.
“He has shown you O man what is good. And what does the LORD require of you,
But to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” Micah 6:8
Our culture and nation is going down. The question is, “Are we going to go down with the boat or are we going to try and plug up the whole and get the water out?”. Lots of people I’m sure are thinking that’s it America is done for, but I’de rather go down fighting, go down trying, caring giving offering help and a hand up instead of putting more holes in the boat, so we sink faster. We all make a difference. I know lots of us feel helpless and hopeless like there’s nothing we can do. But each person who gets up and start to live their best life, the life God gave them, as a good steward of what they have will not have regret at the end of their lives. They will know that they are needed, that it is purposeful. That they can make a difference.
So, we wanted to share the unique calling and blessing of marriage. We hope you gain insight and help in your dating and marriage relationships.